A Cabrock Rant

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The way this season is playing out, I’m not going to have any incentive to write any more articles. Obviously the Saints won another game by a convincing margin and Drew Brees played excellent. If I’m beginning to bore you with my repetitiveness, I apologize, but there really isn’t much else to talk about.

The Saints offence is a well oiled machine and there isn’t a single defence in the league that can shut them down. Brees continues his pace to break some of the leagues prolific passing records and doesn’t even seem phased that the MVP trophy has almost certainly been given to Aaron Rodgers already. The only thing that Brees and the Saints want to win is the Lombardi trophy after taking Superbowl 46. The only part of last week’s game that I want to talk about is how retarded Detroit is.

The Lions are without a doubt the most undisciplined team in sports and look more like a bunch of hoodrats in pads than football players. They claim to be playing with intensity and ferocity, but that team as a unit is an embarrassment to professional athletics. As a pro football player, you’re not only supposed to be competing to win games, but to set an example for the millions of kids that watch the sport and look up to the NFL and it’s players. Suh, Titus Young, Coach Schwartz, and the rest of that sad bunch of human beings all disgust me. One of the first articles ever written for this blog, by Luka, was about how fans shouldn’t be cheering for one team to lose, but rather rooting for their team to win. I would agree with that assessment in most cases, but there are cases where that’s just wrong, and this year’s Detroit Lions are one of those cases. The Detroit Lions don’t deserve to have any fans and I hope they lose every single game they have left this season. Stomping on players, throwing punches, taunting the opposing team, and racking up about 44,000 personal foul penalties in less than a season is an embarrassment, but for Jim Schwartz to not step in and try and straighten out the thugs that play for his team is just sad. The Lions deserve to fall back to their 0-16 ways because they have no respect for their city, the fans, or the game that is paying for their delinquent lifestyles.

Barring a surprisingly close New Orleans game or another huge event in the NFL that I feel I have to rant about, my next few articles will probably focus primarily on college football and the awesome (re: useless) BCS bowl games.

NFL Grab Bag

Tweet This week the New Orleans Saints were on their bye week getting some much deserved rest, so I have nothing to report on the Saints this week. Hopefully Sean Payton and Gregg Williams took this extra week to tighten up the defence and figure out all of the tiny little things that were plaguing the Saints. I’m extremely excited for this week’s Monday night game against the Giants, but this article will be geared towards a few other interesting developments around the league.

Playoff-bound Blunders: As the season has passed the halfway point, the playoff picture has become a little clearer. Many teams are essentially eliminated already and a few looked to be playoff locks. However, 2 teams that looked destined to make the playoffs have taken hits that might be insurmountable: Chicago Bears and Houston Texans. Both teams were coming together really nicely and both looked like playoff-calibre teams, but fate was not on their side. The worst thing that can happen to a franchise happened to both the Bears and the Texans: they lost their franchise QBs to a serious injury. The Texans are still hopeful that Matt Schaub might return in time for the playoffs, but if Matt Leinart is at the helm, Schaub might not get a chance to return this season. Some people are excited to see what Leinart can do with this opportunity, but those people have clearly forgotten the many years he shit away with Arizona. The Bears on the other hand don’t even have a ray of hope for Jay Cutler. Their star QB is planning to undergo surgery on his throwing hand, so he will be out for the season, without a doubt. I was certain that both the Bears and the Texans were going to make the playoffs this season, but the future is looking extremely grim. However, the NFL is a wacky league and you never know how things will play out, so there is always hope for Chicago and especially Houston, who plays in the awful AFC South.

Superbowl/Toiletbowl Ravens: There are currently 4 teams tied for the top spot in the AFC, which would lead some people to believe that the conference is extremely competitive. I would argue that 4 teams tied for first in a conference simply means that there is no clear favourite because no team has pulled away from the pack and proven themselves to be the best. However, if you watched the Ravens play on a good day, you would think for sure that they were the best team in the AFC and potentially the second best team in the league. The problem is, if you’ve followed Baltimore’s season, you’d know that they’ve lost to Tennessee, Jacksonville, and barely pulled away with a victory against Arizona (all teams that will be watching the playoffs from home this season). Whenever I watch Baltimore beat a team like the Steelers or the Bengals, I’m certain that they’re the most dominant team in the NFL and that this is the year Ray Lewis and the Ravens return to the Superbowl. However, then they play a lowly team like the Jaguars and can’t even put up double digit points. The Ravens have 6 more games to prove to the NFL what kind of team they are, and they better figure it out before the playoffs come around. If they continue with this inconsistent play, their football season is going to be done by mid-January.

Lord Rodgers and the Pack Attack: If you’ve been following my articles from the start, or know anything about me, you know that I’m not a Tom Brady fan. There is no doubting that he’s had a Hall of Fame career and has led his team to greatness, but I personally feel that he receives too much credit for the success that the Patriots have had. He’s always had an excellent coach, a good line, receivers that work well in the New England offense, and an opportunistic defence that has given Tom good field position and the opportunity to go out and win games. If you looked at Aaron Rodgers’ season stats, you would think he was the NFL version of Jesus Christ. His 31 touchdowns - 4 interceptions ratio and 128.8 QB rating on the season is unheard of and he’s on pace to break all of the records that Brady and Manning set in their most stellar seasons. However, Rodgers has a great coach, the best receiving core in the game, a huge offensive line to protect him, extremely effective special teams play, and a defence that gives the ball more times a game than a QB could ever wish for. There is no arguing that Aaron is the best QB in the league at the moment, but due to the elite team that he has around him, his stats should be considered inflated. I would argue that almost any starting quarterback in the NFL could step into Rodgers’ role and maybe not be 10-0, but certainly have a winning record and make a strong push for the playoffs.

Rookies of the Year: The NFL hands out a set of awards every year to celebrate the brightest talents of that season. From MVP, to coach of the year, to comeback player of the year, it’s usually very obvious and pretty much everyone who claims to be an NFL fan can tell you who the winner is going to be. However, one award (actually handed out as 2 separate awards) that most people guess wrong every year is the Rookie of the Year award. The problem is that the media will hype up the most exciting rookies or highlight the achievements of the most popular rookies, but these are almost never the players that truly performed for their teams and deserve the award. This year all of the hype is around Cam Newton for the offensive award, and no one really seems to care about the defensive rookie of the year. Sure Cam has had some HUGE highlights and is one of the most exciting players in the NFL, but his poor TD-INT ratio and losing team record almost guarantee that he wont win the award. The true offensive ROY is Andy Dalton. The Bengal’s QB is nowhere near as exciting to watch as Newton and he hasn’t had as many spectacular performances, but Dalton has played steady all season and led the surprising Cincinnati Bengals, a team that everyone thought was going to be crap this season, to an impressive 6-4 record and the chance to battle for a spot in the AFC playoffs. The defensive ROY is a clear choice, but not a player that many people have gotten a chance to watch, or even know about. It’s tough to get credit when you play on a bad team, and to say that the Arizona Cardinals are a bad team would almost be a compliment, but Patrick Peterson is the real deal. LSU’s Pat Peterson was rated the best overall player on almost every draft expert’s scorecard and he’s shown why in his first season as a pro. Peterson has become a shutdown corner on an otherwise shoddy defence and is absolutely spectacular in the return game. He’s tied with Devin Hester for most returns on the season and even returned a punt 99 yards to win a game in overtime this season. Dalton and Peterson are my picks for this year’s offensive and defensive rookies of the year.

2011 NFL Season Preview: Told Through Hip-Hop

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Well so much for any sort of a “lockout hangover”. The 2011 NFL regular season kicked off Thursday night at Lambeau Field with the defending champion Green Bay Packers defeating the 2009 Super bowl champion New Orleans Saints in a thrilling 42-34 game (at no point in the game did my friends and I flip over to Jersey Shore, that should tell you how good it was). Both of the last two Super bowl MVP’s did not disappoint as Aaron Rodgers and Drew Brees combined to throw for 731 yards with 6 touchdowns and 0 interceptions (makes me sad to think that we’ll be getting the complete opposite of this when Tarvaris Jackson goes up against Alex Smith on Sunday). The game ended with Drew Brees marching his team down from their own 20 with no timeouts left to the Packers 9 yard line. An incomplete pass across the middle intended for Darren Sproles looked to be the end of the game until an iffy pass interference call gave the Saints one more chance at the 1 yard line. The Saints tried to run it up the middle with rookie Mark Ingram and got stuffed, I didn’t and still don’t understand the play call by Saints coach Sean Payton. Why not throw it there? Because your QB just marched down the field with ease and was picking apart the other team’s D? Strange play calling. It was a great way to signal the return of football that made me even more excited for the upcoming season and because I’ve grown tired of reading the same season preview on every other site I thought I’d try something new. So here is the 2011 NFL season preview as told by Hip-Hop.

Hah, what the fuck you boys talking about? I know it’s us cause we the only thing you talk about.

To the 2011 Philadelphia Eagles. A team that undoubtedly won the offseason by adding pro bowlers Ronnie Brown, Cullen Jenkins and the best cornerback in football, Nnamdi Asomugha. They have been dubbed among other things: the dream team and “the Miami Heat” of the NFL (I find this particularly upsetting since I have been an Eagles fan since the tender age of 9). However, there are several differences between the Eagles and the Heat, in basketball there are 5 players on the court at one time and Miami had three top 20 players (including two in the top 5) making up 60% of their starting lineup. In football this is simply not the case so even with all of the talent the Eagles have amassed, it will not be as direct of an impact. Secondly, the Eagles did not have a pre-season celebratory parade/show (I still don’t know what to call this) and have downplayed the dream team talk. The main thing to know is like last year the Eagles will only go as far as their star QB, Michael Vick will take them. If Vick gets injured early (and if you watched the O-line in the preseason then it is a possibility) it will be a long season in Philadelphia (although if this happens I will be the first guy to talk myself into Vince Young). If he manages to stay healthy, look out. I will be writing weekly updates on Philadelphia’s season so expect more on the Eagles this year.

I never met a bitch that didn’t need a little guidance. So I dismiss her past until she disappoints your highness.

To what seems to be Bill Belichick and the Patriots organization way of looking at free agency. This year’s off-season led to the acquisitions of Chad Ochocinco, the former Cincinnati Bengals wide receiver who has been in some trouble over the past but nothing too serious. Chad has definitely been a distraction in the past to his QB and the whole team, something that Belichick and the Patriots believe that they can keep out of Foxborough and squeeze whatever is left out of the 33 year old (Btw, am I the only one who finds it insanely stupid that we have to call this guy Chad 85? I feel as if you change your name to something fucking stupid then don’t expect people to always call you by it. And yes I’m also talking about you Ron Artest). The Patriots also took a chance with Albert Haynesworth. An extremely talented defensive lineman who basically committed robbery on the Washington Redskins organization with his play last year. Haynesworth is a proven commodity in the NFL when he is properly motivated and so far he has said all the right things about the Patriots team-first mentality. But what is said off the field and done on it are two completely different things and maybe giving a guy whose nickname was Fat Albert the benefit of the doubt isn’t such a smart thing to do. For more on the Pats, go here.

It’s not about the money, money, money. We don’t need your money, money, money.

Unless you’re Chris Johnson. Then it is all about the money.

But get it while you here boy. Cuz all that hype don’t feel the same next year boy

To the St. Louis Rams and the Detroit Lions as being this year’s unquestionable public favourites to match the hype and take the next step into becoming playoff teams. Both teams have very talented, young but injury prone QB’s in Matt Stafford (Lions) and Sam Bradford (Rams) who are surrounded by talented supporting casts. Both teams even have their own game changers in Calvin Johnson, Ndamukong Suh for the Lions and Stephen Jackson for the Rams. So which team do I think will live up to the hype this season? I’m picking the Rams based on the fact that the rest of the NFC West teams look like NFL Europe teams, in other words, terrible.

Now go to sleep bitch! Die, motherfucker, die! Ugh, time’s up, bitch, close your eyes. Go to sleep bitch! (what?) Why are you still alive? How many times I gotta say, close your eyes?

What every Raiders fan thinks of when he remembers Al Davis is still running the team.

Oooohh, I love you so, but why I love you I’ll never know. Oooohh, I love you so, but why I love you I’ll never know.

To the San Francisco 49ers and their QB Alex Smith who for some bizarre reason will be the team’s starting QB when the season kicks off. In 5 years as a quarterback in the NFL, Smith has piled up these statistics; 51 TD’s, 53 interceptions, a completion percentage of 57.1% and a QB rating of 72.1. George Lopez had a better run as a late-night talk show host. Of course the niners might realize their team sucks this year and are throwing Smith out there to have a better shot at getting Andrew Luck next year.

Fuck the media, I got some suggestions. Fuck Marshall, ask us some questions. Like who is D12, how we get started, (but what about Eminem?) bitch are you retarded?

To the 2011 Indianapolis Colts who are probably getting sick and tired of being called one of the worst teams in football now that their star QB Peyton Manning is out for at least 2-3 months with a neck injury. The Colts will start the season off against the Houston Texans who are now everyone’s pick to win the AFC South. The Colts will begin the season with Kerry Collins under center and even though replacing Manning with Collins is like replacing Leonardo Dicaprio with Billy Zane, Collins is still a solid veteran QB (not the same can be said for Billy and his acting abilities) who can manage a team fine. This Colts team and the way their season turns out will be a very interesting subplot this year.

You don’t know what’s in store. But you know what you’re here for.

To me, you, and the rest of the fans. We have no idea what this season will bring but we do know why we watch. Enjoy the season.

Luka Milanovic

@Luka_M91 on twitter